Thursday, October 06, 2005

fun with brainwashing!

So while screwing around on Sadly, no!, I came across a thread on the Creation Evidence Museum in Glen Rose, TX. It has some, ahem, interesting tidbits of, ahem, "scientific" theory at work, to say the least (the illustrated creation model on the right side of the linked page is hiii-sterical).

The part of the site that's the most fun, however, is the "Creation Exploration" kids' page! Here your child's burgeoning intellect can be exposed to neat new "facts" to confound the evil Islamofascistevildoerpinkocommieleftistcanookbillyyankevolutionists, such as this little tidbit from "Lesson 14: Before the Flood (cont.)":
But before the Flood, there was a canopy of water that stretched around the entire Earth like a huge bubble.
The sun rays had to go through that canopy and the other layers of our sky before it could reach Earth. The canopy was colored magenta or pink and it blocked the bad rays of the sun but only let in the sun rays that would be helpful for our body. Humans, therefore, did not have to worry about getting sunburn.

Also, the good people at the museum have given us a whole new sense of the scope of Noah's ark. From Lesson 11:
Dinosaurs were created on the sixth day of creation along with all the other land animals. Did you know our great-great-many great-grandparents, Adam and Eve, were also created on that same day? Read Genesis Chapter 1 in your Bible. Dinosaurs lived in peace with the rest of creation, and they were even on the Noah’s Ark during the Great Flood.

(thumbing through Bible) hmm... t-rex on the ark? separate the sheep from the stegosauri?... nope not finding it...hmm... well, perhaps we should send Amber and the other medievalists on the hunt for this alternative to the St. George vita:
Humans also hunted dinosaurs. When you hear stories of knights killing dragons, the dragons that are described sound a lot like dinosaurs. There are many tales in almost every ancient land telling of the sighting of huge reptile-like creatures roaming the Earth. In France a city was named to honor the killing of a “dragon” which they said had three long, sharp horns and was bigger than an ox. This sounds like the description of the dinosaur Triceratops.

So, this of course leads to the question...
So could any of the dinosaurs breathe out fire?

Nobody knows for sure, but there are many facts that may prove that there was at least one dinosaur that could.

Riiiiiight. So it's not that "creation scientists" don't believe in dinosaurs, it's that they also believe in dragons. I'm not sure which idea I'm less comfortable with.

And speaking of exposing children, just in case anyone out there was wondering if there would be any weird, Freudian moments, here ya go. From Lesson 13, in reference to Dr. Baugh's "hyperbaric biosphere":
It was a huge, long, metal, tan-colored cylinder that was dotted with many tiny circular windows where people could look into it. Dr. Baugh had given the girls special permission to enter.

Yes, folks, both the "scientist" and his huge, long, tan-colored, dotted, slightly right-leaning biosphere are real. Here is an artist's penetrating portrayal of his evolutionist beater:

(insert caption with double entendre here)

1 comment:

TioChuy said...

Lions, and Tigers, and Velocoraptors Oh my!!! Hmm so the earth was in a sort of amniotic sack? Wheres it's umbilical cord? Tower of Babel? (I saw where they are reconstructing it, or were till we leveled the country) Hmm. Long cylindrical, English pastry