Tony Zirkle: the commercial

Yes, folks, there is a campaign commercial, and it's delicious. Unfortunately I couldn't find any video of it, but I did find a transcript on Tony Zirkle: the website. It shows the Z-man on a black background saying, super-fast so as to fit it all in before the next commercial:

Hello, I’m Tony Zirkle, Republican Candidate for Congress

Some of you have been deeply offended at my campaign tactics, and for inciting your legitimate feelings, I am truly sorry and do apologize.

However, it is my sincere hope that some day that many of you will finally realize why I had to do what I did because the Republican non-leadership would not let Toth, Chocola, or this new good-hearted guy, who seems to help his opponents almost every time he attacks less than fully cocked, debate me fairly in the public square.

You have to fight with the weapons you have.

The truth is that I only said I’d be willing to debate, in stage 4 [of Zirkle's proposed 4-tiered system of criminal justice], "the idea" of the guillotine for 4 or more time serial pre-aged 12 child rapists.

Self-determination slavery reparation segregation is a human right honored in International law and is neither racist nor bigoted. What could be less loving than to ignore the high crime, single parent and std rates in that community?

No father of 3 beautiful Jewish Christian children (their mother converted) is going to be voting to gas innocent ones.

If you want a politician, you’ll have to vote for someone else. If you want a statesman in training, you’ll have to just hold your nose, take a risk and vote for Tony Zirkle on May 6 because I’m the only one on the ballot.

Please visit my campaign site.

I’m Tony Zirkle and this pro-life, anti-porn message now stands approved.

His campaign site says he also plans to run for senator and president! How exciting is that?!